New Thoughts, and Grey Hair

Sometimes you can live for so long in one way, with blinders on, trying like hell to change and to move on, you can forget that change is just around the corner. I've lived in Wisconsin for four months and 12 days, and it wasn't until just yesterday that I saw how close change is. I've been trying hard to be happy with my life, and what I have, and granted, it's easier to be that way than any other. But I'm not used to that -- I'm not like that. I've always wanted more. I'm used to being unsatisfied, and trying to get to the next level. It's who I am. I've had moments of peace, even bliss here in Beloit. Moments when I can feel things are right, they're aligned, and I'm where I should be and I feel how I should.

But I don't think it's a coincidence that yesterday of all days, when I get word from the outside world (DC) that there are jobs, and people who want me for them, I finally get the urge to start blogging again.

As I consider my inevitable move back east, I feel an odd sense of peace. Also, energy. At 11pm last night, I started cleaning my bedroom and hanging stuff up in my closet. I'm cancelling plans and saving my money so I can have enough for my next move. I'm thinking of saving most of my tax refund for that purpose. I guess it depends on how much I get back. I need to weigh how much I want a new iPod against saving money for my next cross country move.

So, new topic! Imagine my surprise when, a few days ago, I looked in the mirror and saw something...odd. I was fluffing up my hair in the bathroom at work, and I saw a oddly colored strand. Upon closer examination, I discovered that it was reddish brown at the bottom, but there was almost two inches of silvery grey at the top, near the root. Now, I haven't colored my hair in almost three months, so there was no color on the top of that hair. It was all natural. Unnatural, rather. It was stiff and wiry, like grey hair tends to be. So it was real. I looked at the rest of my hair and found a number of other ones.

Now, I'm 23. Grey hair at 23? I'm not Taylor fucking Hicks! So I called my mother. What she hadn't told me, ever, was that she also started finding silver hair at 23. So I guess it's genetics. She said she didn't need to cover it up until she was in her early forties, so I have a few years. It's still disturbing.

Next up? Info on my first trip to a Midwestern sex shop.